Unemployment depression!!

I always thought life would be so much easier after varsity but to my surprise things got worse, all I was prepared for was how hard I was going to work and grow myself intellectually in the corporate world. No one ever warned me about the possibilities of not getting a job or interviews for a year and a half, so psychologically I was never prepared to deal it. I went from being a motivated and enthusiastic girl to this hopeless lifeless girl.
Practically after varsity my life was full of midnight and 5am tears, how do you go to bed in peace while nothing is coming together and waking up to do the same routine of sending applications which do not seem to have any fruitful outcome or any outcome at all. The pain of not being progressive in life and I’d ask myself if the difficulties and troubles I faced during varsity were not enough?? And which game is the universe playing with me like is it the rule that we suppose to get what we put in this life thing? And waking up every morning asking myself why do I keep trying and how much of these disappointments I can take. Volunteering in a community library was basically the only way to survive, that kept my mind busy during the day but I would go back to fight battles in mind every night.
Growing up I was always looking forward to the point where I would do everything for myself and siblings, how great it would be to not worry about what I will eat in the morning or if the kids will have bread to carry to school. And now the only thing that is standing between me and that dream are employers and what’s worse is that everyday I wake and do everything there is to do but still nothing good is coming out of it. When things are this bad how do you not feel like a failure? The countless suicide notes and not having the courage to do it, I couldn’t put my siblings through so much pain I mean they’ve endured a lot.
To survive I learned to pray, to have faith, to believe and to stay on his promise that his plans aren’t to harm me but to prosper me. Till this day I’m still waiting on that promise….

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Ambitious Girl

Growing up in a rural area the only thing that can keep a girl going is ambition, wanting more out of life and believing that if I work hard enough I will achieve all that I hope for. Honestly there isn’t much to do in the village, the circle of life is limited to completing matric most likely with poor marks then be a supermarket cashier, somehow become a young single parent or if you’re lucky get married to a man who earns minimum salary with 3 plus kids and worry if you will have enough food to last throughout the month for the rest of your life.

Dare to dream and try to find ways to make those dreams come true, that’s much better than to live a simple standard life. Many people are afraid of failing and trying out new things instead they comform to what is considered normal.

Patience🌼

We all have heard of the expression “patience is key” but what amount of patience can really one practice? We all get to a point where we just can not take it anymore, where either something happens or we just quit.

As a Christian my belief and faith does not allow me to quit anything, if I ever stop doing something it means I have something better to try out. My patience comes from believing that God’s timing is perfect and he has a good plan for my life therefore I never quit, yes I do get tired sometimes and feel like quitting everything but If I don’t work hard for my own future then I am ready to live an average life for the rest of my life.

So basically I never give gave up without a better plan. Good things take time and believe me that’s a fact!!

Focus!

Well a lot of my friends say being focused is about knowing what you want in life, plans for the future and doing everything you can to become what you desire to be. They say focus is to have your head up all the time and not giving in to anything that will delay your progress. In short to them focus is to be always working towards the dream and disregarding everything contrary that is happening around you.

Focus is just how we never forget to nurture the dream while we explore and experience life. I am focused because no matter what life throws at me I never even think of quitting. If you ask me being focus is about a strong mental, breaking down emotionally and being physically exhausted but still keep on trying and pushing the dream. For instance, I have bee trying to get my dream job for a while now, so many regretted posts but I’m still at it.

Being focused is not allowing any form of distractions keep you from achieving what you are ought to do, be it a justifiable reason. It’s to push and strive to fulfil your purpose and do your best out of it. I mean what’s the point of choosing a path when you intend not to commit to it . Focus in short needs to discipline. for examples less “hangout” time with friends to study or do what it is that will get you closer to your dream.